Stockings for Cats? What’s that all about?
I had the most horrible dream about an epic scale zombie attack last night. Before I carry on, I’d like to point out that I am not one to witter on about dreams. I tend to have an automatic switch in my head that plays elevator music and drifts off when people engage me in […]
Read moreThe Doctor vs Beyonce vs Someone from Hollyoaks vs Your Dad
I’m sitting on my sofa watching in sheer disgust, a program called Beyonce vs Rihanna. So far, neither of them have actually appeared live, let alone bludgeon each other to death with large weapons. If you call a show ‘something VS something’ then I expect violence. Instead they are showing their music videos while two […]
Read moreStart As You Mean To Go On
‘Start as you mean to go on’ is a phrase that people seem to continually use on the first day of a new year. Its a stupid phrase and doesn’t really apply to many things. For example a triathlon. If you started with swimming and then tried to swim through the cycling and running events, […]
Read moreHere Endeth the Decade
Its the last ever day of 2009, and, much like the end of every year, it feels pretty much the same as the middle of the year or the beginning or any other bit. Without meaning to sound bah humbug or whatever the NYE equivalent is, I’m never really that fussed about the promise of […]
Read moreA Year of Bloggery!
As of today I have blogged everyday for an entire year! That’s 365 blogs, which is 8 million paragraphs, 670 trillion sentences and 900 bazillion words*. I’ve used more words than you’ve had accidents on a space hopper**. There have been some cheat days, and there was the one day in Bestival where I was […]
Read moreFrozen
Some of you long time blog readers may remember this: http://tiernandouieb.blogspot.com/2009/09/broken.html Well today is the day we finally go and get a new freezer. ‘How on earth have we survived so long without the ability to freeze foods?’ I hear you ask. Well, its simple really. We have a tiny tiny freezer in our fridge, […]
Read moreUndoing Things
I have decided that I am currently conducting an experiment to see if I can do so little with my time that I ‘undo’ things. Perhaps resulting in a creation of masses of negative energy which in turn could open up a tiny black hole which would then suck in all the excess fat I’ve […]
Read moreRisky Monopolising
Some say that the only way to find your true inner self is to go on some sort of namby pamby journey of self discovery, the kind that gap year students spend the rest of their lives boring people with. Others seek religion to do such things, assuming that their God whichever one or many […]
Read moreRound Two
My stomach and guts are having issues with me. Whilst I am really very happy with the vast amounts of booze and food I consumed yesterday, they are less pleased. Yet, what neither of them know, is that they will be subjected to the same level of destruction again today. Yeah! Take that guts! While […]
Read moreMerry Christmas!
Look its Christmas, so I’m not really going to blog. There is drinking and eating to do, so little time to write waffle and if I did it would all be writing waffle on what I’m going to eat and drink, which by the way, is loads. And forgetting my selfish nature you probably don’t […]
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