It doesn’t matter how long I’ve been doing this comedy lark, you really can’t ever quite work out what a gig will be like. Last night I did that stupid thing of judging a book entirely by its cover. This can sometimes work. Such as with the Dictionary. Or a book about famous covers of […]
I recently got Red Dead Redemption for the Xbox (yes women fall asleep now, its for the best. Men, yes I’m years behind everyone else in terms of game buying) and as well as making me addicted to staying indoors and hitting buttons like an agoraphobic panto hater, its very much made me realise I’d […]
Motivation. That’s what I need today. I’m not being a slob or anything, I am just merely doing everything but the writing I should be doing. So far procrastination has led me to tidy up my room, eat a bigger breakfast than I felt like purely as it would take longer to make, pay bills […]
I’m hungover, tired and writing this whilst sitting in my new onesi, which is by the way, the comfiest thing I have ever had the pleasure of wearing. Its like donning a duvet and being constantly hugged by it. I think the only way I could be more content right now would be if I […]
I’m trying to watch the Chilean miners rescue as I type this, so apologies if it goes off on odd tangents at times. They are currently winching out the diabetic one and I feel some sort of affiliation with this man. Once when I went to Pendarren on a school trip, I had to go […]
Every once in a blue moon – a phrase that much like many others, bothers the crap out of me. When is it ever a blue moon? Sure, that’s why it indicates a rare occasion, but why use something that never happens? Why not, ‘every once in an eclipsed moon? Jesus people. Sort it out […]
Yesterday in Bury St Edmunds at the Apex, for myself, Seann Walsh and Phil Nichol, our tools were shit. Im not saying we did a bad job, I’m just saying that were anyone to complain about anything that happened I think all blame can quite firmly be placed on the minimal equipment we needed for […]
Argh its 10/10/10! What does this mean? Are we all going to die? Are the entire events of 01/01/01 going to be reversed? Are we going to have to put up two tents in Estonia? (Work that one out douches) Or, as per usual with these hokum number scares, is pretty much nothing going to […]
One day the world will have to get used to the fact that me and mornings can no longer hang out. Sure we used to be good buddys. I’d get up and morning would be right there, all sunny and happy, birds a singing. Then arm in arm I’d eat my breakfast with morning, and […]
I been drivin’ a van all morning. Oh yes. Call me Dick Van Dyke, call me Van Morrisson, call me Denise Van Outen. Don’t call me that last one. Add on those man points for I been ca-rooo-sin’ around in my white transit van through all the Norf Laandaan roads, shouting at people on Jeremy […]