Inflatable Cocks
In just 20 hours I get to go on the first holiday I’ve had in nearly two years. Generally holidays are a sticky subject between myself and Layla as she only has school holidays in which she can go away, and unfortunately school holidays are prime gig season all year round. Ideally I should go […]
Read moreProminent Jaw and Stinkleman
I hate PJ Harvey. Up until yesterday I was a fan of her music. She is playing Camp Bestival today and I was really weighing up the odds of staying at Camp Bestival to see her or not. I almost didn’t have a choice as I had to cancel my gig in Leeds because they […]
Read moreCamp Bestival
There is a Matt Reed in my house. He was staying in London and made to leave the flat very early, so instead of letting him wander the streets of Finsbury Park by himself we have taken him in, given him tea, and hidden the valuables. The morning is to be spent watching Jeremy Kyle […]
Read moreDeath of the Mullet
I’ve got to go and get my haircut in a minute. I’ve been needing a chop and a snip for sometime now, but have been trying to leave it as close to going away as possible as I know I won’t be able to get it cut in Spain or Scotland. They don’t have barbers […]
Read morePreview Finale
This blog is late. Much later than I intended. I went out for what was meant to be 30 minutes to pick up some giant pictures of cheese and men wearing monocles on expensive bits of card so I can use them for one 30 second joke in my Edinburgh show, and I ended up […]
Read moreZombie Hunter
I watched 28 Weeks Later last night. Having seen 28 Days Later several times and then calling my show 28 Years Later, I felt it was only right to familiarise myself with the second installment of the infected ‘zombie’ horror movie franchise. It goes without saying that it terrified me for some time afterwards. During […]
Read morePicture This
Why is it so difficult to find a hi-res image of a piece of cheese? Ok realistically I can’t imagine why many people would ever take pictures of cheese, then make them hi-res and put them online for the joy of everyone to see. But at the same time the internet has entire websites dedicated […]
Read moreBrevity is the Key To Wit
This blog shall be brief as I have timed my day very badly and slept a bit more than was necessary. I say that but its a Sunday, so there is no amount of sleep that is unnecessary. Unless of course you are due to be at someone’s house for lunch. Which me and Layla […]
Read moreTrainer Day
Trainers, sneakers, runners, fancy man shoes, bits of plastic and leather made by kids in sweat shops, shoe champions, not-gloves, foot warmers, trouser stoppers – whatever you want to call them, I’m going to buy some today. Once a year I have trainer day where I spend far too long trying to find one pair […]
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