Thrills, Mills and Mike Spills

There are reasons why I’ve chosen to move in with Tom, Nat and Maa Blaa in a few weeks time and today is one of them, Upon discussing that we should all meet up for a drink to chat about flat hunting, Tom suggested that instead of a drink, why don’t we all just go to Chessington World of Adventures. Without a moment’s hesitation we had all said yes and now I am about to embark on the most exciting housemates meeting I’ve ever had. Nat has decided all important decisions can only be made whilst on rollercoasters and when I enquired what we should do if the weather is shit, Maa Blaaa replied simply with ‘bring an umbrella?’ I can only take this series of events and responses as proof that our house will be hella fun all the frikkin’ time. I so far, however have contributed nothing except the notion that we might call our place, when we get it, Casa NaToMatTiernan but Nat said we can’t discuss this till on the Vampire ride at the earliest. I fear I may be the dull element of the team. Still, every comedy sketch troupe needs a straight man, right? Right? Sigh.

So a day of thrills, spills, chills and Heather Mills awaits. Ok, just thrills. And if I take a drink on the rides, spills. But not the others. There will however be sealions. This has been promised. And baby leopards. Also promised. Essentially there is very little that can go wrong with today. Unless the Heather Mills appears and feeds sealions to baby leopards. Saying that, I could sell the pics to Heat and stop being so broke.

A few titbits (tee hee hee ‘tit’) to conclude this brief blog before I spend a day being told I’m not tall enough to go on anything and then complain that my ‘adventure’ isn’t to go to a theme park where the theme is merely ‘park’:

– Yesterday I bought a waterproof tent spray for Bestival. Somewhere, someone who made that is going to spend the weekend indoors cackling at my drowning gullible misery. I truly don’t believe it will work but its my best option next to buying a boat or just staying at home. I’m praying that when I spray it, it shoots out waterproof tents and I am hailed as the festival Jesus and carried aloft the mud all weekend.

– I heard on good authority last night that the twins from CITV’s 90’s show of awesome Fun House, are still alive and well and looking as pretty as ever. Rest at ease everyone. I know its been worrying and concerning you all for some time, but its safe to say everything will now be ok. Rest at ease.

– Women are funny. FACT. I went to see the Funny Women semi-final last night and 6 out of 10 of the acts were very good. Well done to those that got through, but my faves were Helen Arney, Laura Lexx, Rachel Parris, Sarah Hendricks and Jess Fostekew. Lovely work all round.

– If you tweet, then please follow @MikeSpillage. Its a wonderful in joke from yesterday’s radio venture that has gained a life of its own.

– On the bus home yesterday I saw, out of the window, a women dressed as a fairy, sitting on the side of the curb, in the rain, crying. This is, by far, the saddest thing I’ve ever seen. I tried clapping to show I believed in her but she didn’t notice and instead was splashed by a passing car.