Apples, Brothers and Doctors


So did any of you catch my brush with fame last night? Yes it was a tiny tiny brush. Yes fame is perhaps an overstatement. No, you probably didn’t see it. Well if you didn’t, I was only bloody well on Big Brother’s Bit On The Side last night wasn’t I? Yep indeed. This beardy wonder found himself sat next to World Music Award winner Shola Ama and cleaning extraordinaire Kim Woodburn on a panel, talking to the very lovely Emma Willis about the antics of some truly repressed individuals. Here sadly, is where today’s blog gets dull, as it was a joy to do. I wish I could tell you some backstage gossip about how Shola demanded she was only filmed at 76 degree angles or how Kim demands 12 frozen monkeys to be delivered to her dressing room before she’ll step on stage, but annoyingly for you, they were both lovely. As were all the staff at BBBots and Emma Willis. In fact, everyone made such an effort to be warm and welcoming, giving me and L booze as soon as we arrived and plying us with cakes and crisps, that the whole evening was much fun to take part in.

Its amazing what a difference it can make. One arsey floor manager or difficult director can make everyone feel on edge and although I wouldn’t have found it too nervous making in the first place, knowing that everyone seemed supportive made me feel very comfortable with the whole thing. Will I watch Big Brother again this series? No. Probably not. I have spent two weeks cramming knowledge about a bunch of people who’s existances make me sad, but for the amount of fun last night was, I’m fairly glad. Especially when I think about all the fame that’s followed such a tv appearance. What fame? Well let me tell you people, I gained zero Twitter followers and when I looked at the #bbbots hashtag one person said ‘I hate that bearded twat that’s on #bbbots’. There is a small chance she meant Jamie from Holy Moly, but I doubt it. As for me, how have I embraced this new lifestyle? Well I got out of the black Ford Mondeo that was sent to pick me up, got straight into PJs and eat a cold Quorn burger. I expect Heat magazine to come knocking on my door any second now….though it’ll probably be as they are trying to interview someone famous nearby and my music is on too loud. Still, you make do with what you can.

Incidentally I’d like Aden to go out on Friday and I want Jay to win. Just sayin’.



So the Hennessey and Owen amendment sadly wasn’t passed in the house of Lords yesterday, which felt like a blow to the NHS. There was some genuine panic across Twitter and I started to fear the day I have to pay for my diabetic equipment wondering if any one had a medical dictionary I could borrow and how I go about extracting pig insulin myself.

Its not the end of hope for the NHS by any means. If anything, the amount of coverage it got yesterday has highlighted how angry people are, and there are still several stages for it to go through before its fully passed. I’ve said a lot about my opinions on things these last few blogs so here, read this:



And if you’re wondering what we can do about it? Have a read of this:


There. Now get to work.



How is it that before Steve Jobs died he didn’t fix making downloading the new iPhone update so laborious? Its not been as slow as usual, but there was still a good hour today where my main means of communication, my iPhone, was otherwise engaged just so I could make its texts look glossier, gain iMessage which seems largely unexciting and probably only serves to help those rioters with iPhone join in the action, and iCloud. iCloud so far has been successful in deleting all my contacts on my phone as they are now synced with the ether in some way. I don’t know what this means. Can I now stroll out into a cloudy day, hold my iPhone aloft into the sky and gain all the numbers in the universe? Somehow I doubt it. Calling an app something as grand as iCloud I expect it to cloud the minds of those I point it at, to conjure digital rain upon foes, or even just make people feel a bit Eeyore type grumpy at will. As yet, it just seems to have overcomplicated a system I rather liked.

Add that to all my apps being taken out of their comfy well named folders (Pics & shiiiiiit, Batman Belt (useful utilities), Gameshizzle and McGuyver Styles amongst many) and once again the advances in technology have merely kicked an OCD sufferer down. And not in the right order to at least make it less painful. In fact I’ve just spent 4 minutes not finishing this blog and trying to put my apps back in the right order. For fuck’s sake Apple! Im off to go get a Blackberry. At least I know with the current screw ups I’ll get a few hours of peace and quiet and no distractions with one of those. Pah.