More Sleep Please

Bloody hell, how good is sleep? I had some of that last night and think I might have to have more at some point soon. Not sure what I like most about it yet, whether its the bit when you sleep or the bit when you wake up decide you’re still knackered from Glasgow and go back to sleep. I also quite like the bit when you wake up and go ‘Yeah I did some of that sleeping malarky!’ I didn’t get home till far too late last night and felt a bit like Glasgow had broken me. In a nice way, but broken nonetheless. I have understood that I am clearly getting older as two nights of solid drinking and little sleep has taken its toll on me like a vengeful toll booth. I am very afraid about Edinburgh this year as that is 30 days of solid drinking and no sleep. I think I will actually die. I might start drinking water and having extra sleep now just to cope. Its a shame you can’t build up a reserve of these things. I’d quite like to sleep for a week now and then not sleep at all through Edinburgh. I bet when the future arrives you’ll be able to do that. That will be one of the first things they make possible along with moon shoes and normal everyday items that look like they’ve been covered in tin foil.

I can’t sleep this week as its another relentless week of gigging. If I wasn’t busy I’d be miserable about not having any work, but being busy is annoying as I’d like to sleep, see Layla, play Xbox and be a lazy arse. Of course if I was doing that I’d then be miserable that I was doing that. I think I have to realise I am very hard to please. Tonight is Old Rope which I haven’t done for a little while. I really love that gig but the thing I always regret about booking myself into it is it means I have to do some work and write new gags. I don’t think I have any for tonight and so this afternoon will be spent writing half-arsed jokes that won’t work and therefore ruining the point of me doing a gig where I try new material. I will still do it though as I’m a glutton for punishment and if I stayed at home I’d get sad I wasn’t trying out half-arsed jokes at a gig. I really do wonder if I have issues.

I’m also really looking forward to Stewart Lee’s Comedy Vehicle tonight on BBC2. If you are in tonight you should watch it, and if you are not in then you should cancel what you are doing and watch it. Unless you are coming to Old Rope then you should go out and watch it on iplayer. I am very happy to shamelessly promote Stew’s show because I’m 100% sure it’s going to be one of the best things on TV for a very long time. The reason for this is because Stew wrote it and made all the decisions about it instead of some clueless fuckwit getting a bunch of people who’ve never worked together to write a show no one likes but statistically seems to do well because the TV people think its too bland to be hated. I’m sure some of my criticism of TV is because I’m not on it, an error I constantly think should be rectified as I would probably fix all the TV’s by being on them. But a large part of my upset towards comedy programs is that I like watching them and I know many many very funny people with very funny ideas who don’t get to put them on the tellybox because My Family and Grown Ups are gently pleasing people with no taste everywhere. It generally seems to be the case that people who are actually good at being funny don’t get to make shows much, and instead its all handed to people who all seem to think comedy is a fat man shaking his stomach around as a punchline to everything. So please watch Stew’s show tonight and make a point of getting the ratings up for a show that will most definitely deserve it. And if, for some mental unexpected reason it’s rubbish then you can come and take all my sleep away as punishment. It won’t be, so prepare to lose suckers.