Edinburgh Day 27

Today is really stupidly exciting and honestly very little else matters. My week has already been filled with encounters with people I’m not sure how to speak to or cope in the presence of, but today it excels to a new level. Yes I was unable to approach Reese Shearsmith or Eddie Izzard due to sheer awe and nerves, but shortly I will be attending a Q&A at the Udderbelly with Clarke Peters, aka Lester Freamon from The Wire. Then afterwards, courtesy of Ed from the Underbelly, I should be able to meet him and Dominic West aka McNulty. Oh dear God. I’m not sure what to say or do if I do get to meet them. I’m scared I will just start blabbering about a ‘re-up on the package’ or just quiver like someone having a fit before keeling over backwards or worst, accidentally call one of them ‘Dad’ or say ‘I love you’ or something. The latter would be really bad as my Dad will be there as will Layla, and both may get upset by this. The Wire is possibly the bestest bestest TV show ever ever and to meet two of the main people from it will be slightly too much. Expect tomorrow’s blog to be filled with embarrassing tales of me vomiting on my own shoes or things to similar effect. Generally I’m great at meeting famous type peoples. I can usually keep my cool and act all polite and friendly. But every now and then, I meet someone I truly respect and completely mess it up. I met Kevin Spacey when he was doing his run of The Icemen Cometh at the Old Vic. Me and my friends Mat and Wilz all waited backstage to meet him like utter geeks. He appeared, said hello and offered to sign our programmes, but before he could I blurted out the words ‘you are, like, one of my idols’ like some 16 year old American teen girl. As the words left my mouth I felt like such a dick. For a start he wasn’t really an idol of mine. I thought his acting was amazing and loved several films he’d done, as well as thinking the play we’d just seen had been amazing. Secondly, any shred of dignity I had hoped to keep after such a lame comment, was completely destroyed by Wilz letting a large snorty ‘Ha!’ at my patheticness. Luckily Kevin Spacey ignored my stupid words and was very lovely, signed everything before getting into his chauffeur driven porsche and driving away. Since then I have either excelled at just being able to handle people’s celebrity level or when I know its someone I might just spazz out in front of, run away. Case in point was the after party of The Good, The Bad and The Queen gig where I just stayed on the other side of the room from Damon Albarn and Dennis Hopper. Or the other day with Reese Shearsmith and Eddie Izzard. But tomorrow, Ed said he would introduce me to Dominic and Clarke so its highly likely I’ll really mess things up.

Some other things:

– Only two shows to go! Hooray! Going to try and remember to record the last two so I can put them on my website as an mp3 just incase I never do it again.

– Nat has swine flu. This is not good although I like to believe my immune system is pretty hardcore so I am going to do nothing to prevent getting it. Yes, that is a challenge to you bacteria. Yes, it is highly likely I will get it and vomit on McNulty and Lester. To be fair we are not 100% sure it is swine flu as it was diagnosed by a doctor over the phone. He said that Nat shouldn’t come in to the surgery for fear of infecting people. I think he is just lazy and says that to everyone. Nat however, does feel quite ill.

– Despite it being Eri’s birthday, everyone was so knackered last night that we just stayed in, ate the birthday cakes (yes, cakes plural cos we are pigs. Especially Nat as she has swine flu) and watched Cloverfield. I had seen it before with Layla and I remembered why I got annoyed with it the first time round. There is no need to show the monster. No need whatsoever. I prefer my imagination to your shit CGI Mr Abrahms so let me come up with something better in my warped head then your tripod like loser beast. I like the film up until that point. I wish more films would realise that people’s heads are more disturbed than anything you can do on a computer. I do however like that they never explain the creature’s existence. Well done for that JJ. Layla fell asleep when we saw it in the cinema. She also fell asleep when watching it last night. I think this is a sign of the films quality. Also it annoys me that nowhere in the film does it focus on the field where they make the butter. Arf.

– A little girl called Imogen in the front row of Comedy 4 Kids today, tied her own leg to her chair. That was brilliantly weird.

– If you are Underbelly staff, or around the Underbelly on Sunday from 8pm, me and Keith Farnan are doing a special show where we just sit in the Cow Cafe and get drunk while talking about things. We have asked all staff to give us 60 subjects to talk about for 1 minute at a time. It will be messy. Messy but fun.

– Tonight I am seeing the Penny Dreadfuls. While I am really looking forward to this, I can’t help but feel everything will be dwarfed by my Wire experience. Including my show. I have a feeling my show will be 55 minutes of me gibbering about The Wire. Sorry for all those who attend. And sorry to the Pennies too.

– I like that more people have commented on my blog during these Edinburgh ones, than have before. Thanks for this. Clearly me complaining about how long it all goes on for, is enough to make you want to mention things. Please continue. In regards to previous comments:

Keeno – yes that is a sack of cack. Well pointed out. Random acts of kindness make the world go round. Gravitational pull is a big fat lie.

Isihac – lets go! Marmite apathetics lets all run amok, or just be apathetic about it all. The latter is more likely.

Ben Hewis – Sir Bedalot is good. However I think it sounds like a very whorish knight.

Those are comments from the blogger page. Facebook ones can have actual replies as I can hunt you down, find your profile and make judgements on you based on that pic of you your mate took when you were well pissed and you’ve thought that by putting it up no one will base all opinions of you on it. Wrong. I will.

I’m going to meet McNulty and Lester!!!!!!!!!!! Yes that amount of exclamation marks is necessary. Here are some more. Deal with my excitement!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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