Free Parking

Last night was a pretty good start to gigging again after my two weeks of slob. I was booked in for two gigs, but sadly the first one was cancelled due to the bleakness of a January monday. It seemed a nice venue too, but I was pleased it was pulled as I felt rusty and I was sure that performing to 12 people in a room that should hold 150 wouldn’t be the antidote to my mental lethargy. On the plus side I didn’t have to pay for parking in the nearby expensive car park because the attendant thought I was an idiot and needed pity. I’m fairly sure that’s how he took my stressed face and ranting ‘cos the ticket machine wasn’t working and I was in a rush. Its amazing how incompetence can let you get away with anything. Several times now I have boarded buses for nothing by claiming ignorance that my Oyster card had no cash on it. Those people that have taken pity are doing the wrong thing. By using your kindness you are helping to breed a criminal and one day you will rue the day I was let off the £2.50 parking ticket when I am a master of the underworld. 

The second gig was the ying to the first’s yang by selling out entirely. Old Rope is a damn lovely gig and as its a new material night only, its a great avenue to just throw bits of material at the crowd knowing they wont crucify you if its rubbish. Chances are they wouldn’t crucify you if they wanted to because pub landlords are often against people carrying big bits of wood into bars. Unless they are tables. Last night however it felt like there was some pressure in doing new stuff because the room was truly rammed thanks to the presence of some bloke called Dave Gorman. Also the standard of acts overall was quite high so I quickly wished I hadn’t written all my notes in an hour yesterday afternoon before getting distracted by the Xbox. 
Luckily the crowd were lovely and even my new bits about slightly touchy material (i.e Gaza and a cleverly disguised Baby P gag) went down very well leaving me with some new stuff that I will continuously forget to use at every gig for the next three months. The whole rest of the line up that I managed to catch was brilliant with some top new stuff from Carey Mark, Matt Kirshen said aids a lot and Holly Walsh had a great two people sketch with just one person in it. Dave Gorman closed with some truly great gags too and it was nice to see him back on the stage doing stand up. Especially as after speaking to him it appears he’s just doing it because he felt like doing stand-up again. Its nice to know that so many people on the circuit are just dying to get into TV, radio and tapestries but that lots of people who do get there really miss the stand-up side to things. I wonder if that opinion would change if they found themselves in a service station off the motorway at 3am on a Tuesday night. Unless its Leigh Delaware or the M6 toll one because those are in my top 5 best ones. 
I ended up staying at Old Rope for far too long afterwards, adhering to my self imposed drinking ban and instead becoming the designated driver for an unruly mob who provided me with loads of in car entertainment for the journey home. It was fun but I’m always a bit rubbish around drunk friends when I’m really sober. Next time I’ll have to drink heavily and drive them all home which would be the best of both worlds no doubt. 
Then this morning I was woken at 8.40am by Rosie, one of my cats, mieowing in my face till I woke up. Once I had woken up, she walked off. I’m wondering if I somehow asked her unintentionally for a wake up call. If I did then I’m an idiot for setting it so early and well done her for not letting me get away with it. 

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